Here is a list: Pneumonia. Kidney biopsy. Diagnosis. Intravenous steroids. Immunosuppressant regime times many. Knee cartilage scrape when they should have solved for dead hip. Wisdom teeth. Fibula removal. Kidney biopsy. Prednisone induced psychosis. Total hip replacement. A procedure. Appendix rupture. Stomach infection. Plex. Transfusion. Ultrasounds times many. C-section. Fractured pelvis. Infusion. Transplant list.

And doctors and doctors and doctors.

The medicine in your vein is cold, at first. This is how you know a body is a body. Innately warm even if your toes are cold. Even if you felt a shiver because hospitals are either hot and stuffy or unbearably cold.

My life is tenuous.

And bold.

Deanna McFadden (she/her) is a writer, editor, and publishing professional. Her current role as VP, Head of IP Strategy sees her managing a robust program of adult, YA, and graphic novels for Wattpad WEBTOON Book Group. The author of over 20 abridged classics for kids, her stories and poems have appeared in Taddle Creek, Anonymous Juice, Sad Girls Lit Club, among others. Her essay, “The Girl on the Subway,” appeared in The M Word, Conversations About Motherhood (Goose Lane, 2014). Her debut novel, The Work Boyfriend, came out in 2023 and is published under her rom-com pseudonym, Rebecca Mardon. She lives with her husband and son in Toronto.

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